We are out celebrating Mum’s birthday, which is inconveniently placed in the week leading up to Christmas. Just the two of us. For food and drinks.

“I don’t like that my birthday is just six days before Christmas but then I’ve had to live with it my whole life.”

Makes sense, as that’s usually the case with birthdays…

“Everyone is always skint leading up to Christmas,” continues Mum. “Everyone has family prep, work and parties to attend and are so busy rushing around for the big day.”

“Self, self, self,” I say.

“Exactly. I mean, there’s an element of boredom –

This makes me laugh: “An element of boredom?”

 “Yes,” she jokes, “an element of boredom waiting for Christmas Day coming so they can’t be bothered to celebrate birthdays or anything else. As a birthday is a big thing and Christmas is a big thing. People don’t want to celebrate both.”

“So people will wish you a happy birthday but then ask in the same breath what are you doing for Christmas and New Year?” I ask.

“Always!” Mum replies.

“I also get a birthday and Christmas present all rolled into one, usually wrapped in Christmas paper and linked in some way.”

 “Are you apathetic about your birthday then?”

“Well the older I get, the more I think I can’t be bothered myself! My birthdays just go by the by.”

“What’s been the worst birthday you recall?” I quiz.

“I had a big birthday, arranged a drinks party and hardly anyone came.”

“The bastards!”

“Indeed!” chuckled Mum then took a long sip of her birthday cocktail.

“I mean, it’s only as you get older that you really want people to celebrate your birthday with you. But, like I say, it’s good luck with getting people out!”

“Everywhere, restaurants and pubs, are always busy too – or only have their Christmas menus on.”

“Precisely. You can’t necessarily get booked up anywhere, or need to pay deposits or have set meals. It’s just far too much planning. I can’t be arsed.”

“What’s been your favourite thing on today’s birthday, Mum?”

“These cocktails!”

“They are delish.” I agree.

“I don’t think I could drink more than two as I may feel a little bit tiddly,” states Mum,

“You couldn’t drink more than two when it’s a shot of rum, shot of vodka and a shot of butterscotch liqueur? I think two is enough…”

We raise our glasses: “Cheers!”

“Do you feel outshone due to what Christmas actually celebrates, having to contend with someone else’s birthday on Christmas Day?” I ask.

“Yes, I do feel upstaged, but that’s the way life is,” Mum says matter of fact.

 “Upstaged by the Lord Jesus Christ?!”

“You can’t have it all ways,” says Mum. “On the plus side, because it’s my birthday in the week leading up to Christmas, I can be drunk every day of the week until Christmas Day!”

Happy Birthday Mummy – and Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animals!

 

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